Is that the smell of brimstone?

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No, it’s cat puke. Flossy the wonder Cat is not well… Her usual grouchy demeanour has degenerated into a tirade of hissing, swatting and puking, intermingled with whining. We are worried, although less so since she vomited up some tinsel. I would ask where she got it from but it came from me. They say no good deed goes unpunished and this is true. Flossy is a house cat. She was around 4 years old when her pervious owner, an elderly lady, died. She’s never been outside and my mother is loath to let her out in case she runs out in front of the first steamroller to pass by. So, out of concern for the poor kitty and to give her some exercise and play time, I ran around the house like a complete moron dragging a piece of tinsel behind me for the beast’s entertainment. Flossy loved it. So much that when my back was turned, she ate it. Puked for two days before the big reveal; the tinsel, upchucked into her food bowl. Some act of feline protest, like, this is not food. She has a full buffet that she absolutely demands must be replenished constantly. Tomorrow we are going out to buy tuna. For the cat. Because although she is eating normally and keeping it down, the hissing has not stopped and she’s constantly scratching her ears. No one can get close enough to take a look, but I suspect (with the help of the internet) that she has ear mites and on Wednesday, she’s going to the V.E.T. Yes, I need to spell it out, we can’t risk her knowing she will be starved for the entire morning, stuffed into a cat box and then unceremoniously ferried to the V.E.T. Oh the indignity. Oh the wrath when she returns. I am not going, it’s my job to put on a full feline buffet complete with tuna for her return to calm her rage somewhat. I hope. Watch this space to see if I survive…


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