Trapped without wine! My bad…

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Another day in the tropical jungle of Mount Vernon, Westchester, NY and I find myself trapped by a faulty door knob. I couldn’t make this up if I tried. And if that isn’t strange enough, before my impromptu incarceration, I had searched three grocery stores for a bottle of wine and come up empty handed. What is going on?

Three grocery stores selling beer but no wine? The first one I put down to a fluke. The second to very bad luck, but the third, Trader Joe’s, home of the mighty Two Buck Chuck, was a sure thing. Surely. No? NO. Here in Westchester is a Two-Buck-Chuckless-TJ’s. What is this – the end of the world? People of Westchester, what is going on? WHERE IS YOUR WINE?

My question was answered by a very nice man in a wine shop in Pelham. Apparently, the grocery stores can not sell alcohol over 8% Vol.

Fortunately, that conversation happened last night, while I was buying an over sized bottle of Cab. Before the door knob got stuck. Turns out it is as light and fruity as the man in the shop said it would be. Oh, go on, it is afternoon and I am trapped, I’ll just break out the chocolate with that glass of wine. I’m bad 😉


Words of Wisdom (and red, red wine…)

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Biffo is another artist in residence here on Chicken Road, and every now and again, Biffo has ‘Words of Wisdom’. Usually dispensed with all the drama of the Oracle of Delphi, but instead of a dusty cave filled with psychotropic fumes, Biffo’s Words come from a comfy arm chair, wearing a reindeer onsie  (with hood and antlers) and red flannel dressing gown.

Past Words of Wisdom that have punctuated normal civilized conversation like a volcanic eruption include:

“We need to be Spartan or we’ll all have gout…”Oracle_of_Delphi__by_hybridgothica

And the enigmatic-

“When the cupboards are bare, shit tastes like nectar…”

Truer words were never spoken. Today, Biffo’s ‘Words of Wisdom’ concerned the demon drink.  As it was Happy Tuesday on Chicken Road, we were communally imbibing the product of the vine while waiting for the Chicken and purple potatoes to slow roast – our own little bacchanalia, when Biffo suddenly sat up, cross legged like a naughty imp on a mushroom, thrust her wine glass into the air and declared:

“Red red wine… slides down the throat like a serpent and bites like an asp…”

Yes, this is true, “if you drink too much of it…” Biffo mutters while spluttering cheap Spanish red “and I like too much of it…” she continues.

Yup, she does. After all, she is an artist. Of sorts… I like a mojito myself. If it was good enough of Hemingway it’s good enough for me. Which makes me think of my herb farm, the one in my head. I love growing and using herbs and I dream of having a herb garden to potter in. Lavender, sage, rosemary, and mint. If I want a good Mojito, I need to grow some mint. Time to get into the garden…